By Robert Stuberg |
Having long-lasting relationships takes work. Anyone who thinks otherwise is probably living alone in a cabin far away from civilization.
It’s difficult to get along with ourselves so it shouldn’t surprise us to learn that getting along with other people takes work.
Have you ever thought about the fact that some problems or challenges in life are solvable and some are not? In other words, some problems have ready-made solutions while others just don’t have permanent fixes.
Relationships definitely fit into the category of problems without permanent solutions. One day we can be sailing along beautifully in a relationship and the next day it’s as if everything changed. Marriages can be great examples of this phenomenon. My wife and I have been together for over three decades now, and I have to admit that I still have those days when I’m completely puzzled by her and how she responds to something.
We should remember that relationships are not really designed to be solved like you solve a math problem. Relationships are much more complex with an endless number of lessons to be learned.
The best way to make a relationship work is to remember a couple of key points. Here they are: First, never take a relationship for granted. (The only exception to this is a relationship that you want to lose.) Second, never assume that you completely know another person. Believe me when I say that there are depths and realms in each of us that would take many lifetimes to fully explore. Finally, never assume that just because yesterday was a good day that today will automatically be smooth sailing in the relationship. Each new day in a relationship requires vigilance and perspective.
So solve your math problems in life but don’t expect singular solutions to your relationship challenges. The best approach relative to relationships is to continue to work on them each and every day. Focus on improving yourself and how you relate to others while at the same time remembering to never give up on the important relationships that are the most important part of your life.